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Injury: Back to Square... One? Zero? (I really don't know)

I hate to have to admit this on the blogosphere, but I think I better, since I always try to write in a way that is real and not (or at least not too) fake. So here it is: I officially injured my left knee. Probably did something to the meniscus. Which is rather ironic, in a way, since I have always thought it the stronger side. This, on top of the fact that I have a sore throat right now and can barely speak (but can still blog :-)) makes for a very interesting time.

I think the whole knee issue started a few weeks ago, when I decided to try going into Utkatasana from a squatting position in Surya B. The first few days I tried this, my left knee felt sore. And then my SI joint went out. So I switched to doing primary and the first few backbends of second to try to straighten out this issue. The SI joint healed, but the soreness/tweakiness in the left knee joint persisted. Basically, I discovered that postures which involve closing the left knee joint and bringing the left foot close to the left hip (Triangmukhaikapada Paschimottasana, Krounchasana, Bhekasana) tend to aggravate the left knee. Things got somewhat better on Wednesday, which was a moon day, presumably because I didn't practice and the body got to rest. And then during yesterday's practice, I definitely pushed past my limit in Bhekasana (I'm one of those people who can get the entire sole of the foot to the ground in this pose, which is a good thing when you are not injured. If you are injured, well, not so...), because my left knee felt really stiff after practice. (Why do I do this to myself? Ego. Guilty as charged...) 

And, to add insult to injury, when I got off the bus to campus yesterday, I jumped off the bus, landed on my left foot, and immediately felt that something was very wrong. For the rest of the day, I couldn't put pressure on the left foot while walking without feeling pain in my inner knee. Walking up the stairs is fine, but walking down the stairs hurts. I felt around my left knee, and found this tender spot on the inner knee. No good, no good. I spoke with a couple of people about this, and they suggested that I go get an MRI and get it checked out. It looks like I don't have a choice with this one; did I ever tell you that I dread/hate going to the doctor's? But what to do? 

This morning, I did a shorter practice: Primary up to Triangmukhaikapada Paschimottanasa, then skip to Baddha Konasana, followed by the rest of primary and finishing. I noticed a few things:

(1) When I stepped out into the standing postures (Trikonasana, Parsvakonasana, etc.), I felt pain in my left knee, as if the stepping out movement was pulling on something in the left knee.

(2) When I got to Ardha Baddha Padmottanasana, I really hesitated about doing the posture on the left side, but decided to try going into it very slowly on the left side. There was some discomfort closing the knee joint, but it closed, and I was then able to get into half-lotus. As I went into half-lotus, I felt something shift in the knee joint.

After I did Ardha Baddha Padmottanasana, I decided, on a whim, to try the stepping out movement again. This time, it did not hurt. It appears that whatever was hurting the knee the first time had something to do with whatever it was that had shifted in the knee.

(3) I skipped the Marichyasanas today, because the act of closing the left knee joint combined with twisting or bending forward causes pain in that knee. Would one way of modifying the Marichyasanas be to not close the knee joint completely and/or not bend forward or twist fully? If any of you out there have any suggestions on this, I would live to hear them. 

So, this morning's practice was not great, but it was definitely healing. A few minutes after practice, I tried walking down the stairs in my apartment, and discovered that my knee did not hurt anymore. Which is good, because otherwise I won't be able to leave the house today. But injuries are really a bummer... 

Oh, and by the way, I am not writing this post to glorify injury or to advocate wearing injury like a badge of courage/honor/whatever. Injuries, as you can see, suck. But maybe they are part and parcel of the process for some people (i.e. me). So I will do my best to swallow my ego and try to learn from this. In the meantime, between my knee and my sore throat, you may find me posting less over the net few days. Not that you'd care, necessarily. But just thought I'd let you know :-)


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